Wednesday, August 25, 2010

At the hospital

This is a picture of me when I was still at the hospital. The only difference between the two pitures is one person.
The guy with the beanie hat  is my  brother Diego. The girl with the curly hair is his fiancé. The girl in white is my cousin Franciele. The man and the woman beside her are her parents. My mother is beside my aunt Maria. and my father behind my mother. The guy in the mustache is my cousin Jane's husband (Joel) and the half face you see behind Franciele is Jane. In the other picture the bald guy with mustache wearing blue is my friend Flávio.

I had a severe kidney infection that passed to my lungs. I’ve had a breathing arrest and stayed sedated and in induced coma for two months, so I lost the movements, specially of my legs and feet. Now I am walking but with help of a walker, and I’m doing physical therapy.
During the time I was asleep at the hospital, I needed a couple of sessions of hemodialysis, a blood transfusion and a tracheotomy. My body was so inflated I’ve got stretch marks in my belly and in my arms, but what matters is that I am still alive. My disease was really serious and I could have died. My doctor said he told my family twice to buy my coffin ‘cos there was no hope for me… I’ve got really surprised that my cousin Camila and my brother Diego were really engaged or worried about me cause I’ve always thought they hated me. My Mother used to visit me almost everyday and Marcelo almost every night. He told me in our first Brazilian Valentine’s day (June 12th), I was really ill and sedated, but he was there by my side caressing my head.
When I woke up I knew I was at the hospital, but I didn’t know how long I had been there. I was there for almost two months. They were in the middle of the Soccer World Cup. I couldn’t speak because of the hole in my neck where they connected a machine that kept me breathing and it was desperating. I thought about my Granny and my Aunt Lúcia all the time. They died respectively in February and April. I imagined their bodies getting rotten inside their coffin and it made me so afraid of dying. I tried to think about something else but I just couldn’t control my thoughts. My dog Miolo disappeared the day I came back home from the hospital. I didn’t even saw him. This makes me so sad… I imagine he must have died over runned somewhere. But well, that’s enough of talking about it. I am fine and happy for being alive.